


One baby step at a time

by Francx



Series: Baby Steps [1]
Category: ARGONAVIS from BanG Dream! AAside (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, English isn't my first language sorry, Established Relationship, Implied Sexual Content, Just a slap tho, M/M, Mentions of Violence, Nayuta trying to figure out feelings, Probably ooc, This is completely self indulgent but I figured someone else might enjoy it as well, Yuuto is an amazing friend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:42:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29467440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Francx/pseuds/Francx
Summary: Ren looked at him dead in the eyes, with the angriest look anyone had ever seen on his face and his fists balled up,“Fuck you, Nayuta.”
Relationships: Asahi Nayuta/Nanahoshi Ren
Series: Baby Steps [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2173344
Comments: 3
Kudos: 24





	One baby step at a time

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the song "True Colors" by Slaves.

Ren and Nayuta were a couple. Everyone around them knew it. Yet it never showed. 

Nayuta wasn’t exactly… stable. Everyone was also aware of this. He was cold, snarky, defiant. 

Yet Ren looked at him like he held the night sky in his eyes. 

But Nayuta never looked back at him. Not in public at least. 

When Ren found the courage to reach out for Nayuta’s hand while hanging around their friends, the other moved away, putting as much distance between himself and the other boy as he could.

Ren never really understood what Nayuta’s love language was. When they were alone Nayuta seemed to be more willing to talk, but never about feelings. He never really touched the other either, unless he needed sex.

Sex with Nayuta was intense. It was violent and hard, but it was the only time the boy let himself go and showed Ren how much he cared for him. He would always look at Ren intently, watching for signs that he wasn’t comfortable or wished for him to stop. Ren knew he would never do anything to him that he wasn’t okay with. Whenever Ren showed discomfort, Nayuta would stop whatever he was doing to kiss him and look him in the eyes like he was the only thing that mattered. He never said it, but Ren understood. He would reach down and lock their fingers together, and Nayuta would not complain or move away. 

Most days, Ren could take it. He had accepted that love from Nayuta came in small doses and couldn’t be forced. The rare times Ren would get a spontaneous kiss from the other, he would quietly celebrate and hold them gently in his heart. 

But Ren wasn’t happy. He felt like he was walking on the edge of a razor. And people started to notice. 

After band practice, Ren was sweaty and tired. He hadn’t slept very well and felt like he couldn’t give his all while singing. He sat down on a bench in the practice room while saying goodbye to his bandmates, who were all heading to their part time jobs.

Only the guitarist, Yuuto, stayed behind. 

“Hey, uhm. Are you okay?”

“Oh, Yuuto, you don’t need to worry, I just didn’t sleep too well yesterday so my singing wasn’t as good. But I’ll be back in top shape in no time!” Ren said, faking enthusiasm. 

“That’s not what I mean. Is Nayuta treating you well?”

“O-oh… Of course he is. He would never hurt me”.

“I know that, I’m just afraid he will hurt you… unwillingly”.

“That’s just not possible”, Ren said, with a joking tone, “Nayuta is not dumb!” 

“Nayuta…” Yuuto stopped, a sad expression on his face “He’s very dumb about feelings. He doesn’t know how to show you he cares. He doesn’t even look at you when anyone else is around. Are you okay with that?”

“He means well, I think”.

“You didn’t answer my question. Are you okay with how he behaves with you?”

Ren didn’t speak. He looked down at the carpeted floor, as if trying to avoid Yuuto’s inquisitive stare. 

“I’m going to talk to him”.

Ren lifted his head quickly, “N-no, I don’t need it. It’s not necessary”.

“Look”, Yuuto sighed, “I’m not gonna just stand here and let my friend be walked all over by some guy. Even if that guy is Nayuta”. 

Before Ren had time to respond, the guitarist had walked out the door, leaving him cold and scared.

\--

Nayuta wasn’t at his house when Ren went to look for him after practice. 

It was only 4pm, but Ren decided to go home and sleep. He really didn’t want to have to think.

He only woke up the next morning, his phone loudly buzzing on his nightstand. He picked up.

“Mhh… What’s up, Yuuto? I just woke up”.

“Yeah, I figured. I called you just so you would wake. Wanna come have breakfast together? I’m downstairs making coffee”. 

“Sure, give me a second”. 

Ren hung up the phone. He really enjoyed living with his band mates. They were always there for him, literally and figuratively. They were like a family to him.

He quickly slipped on some pants and joined Yuuto in the kitchen. The other boy was already dressed to go out, presumably for one of his university classes. 

“Did everyone else leave already?”

Yuuto turned around to look at him, “Yeah, Wataru needed to talk to a professor, and Banri and Rio went to pick up some groceries”.

“Why is your cheek so red?”

There was a pause, and Yuuto shifted his gaze away from the other.

“I talked to Nayuta yesterday”.

“Did he… He hurt you, didn’t he?”

“I think I scared him. I told him it won’t be long before you go and leave him, if he doesn’t change how he is around you. He slapped me and…” Yuuto brought a hand to his cheek. 

“He started crying afterwards. I’ve never seen Nayuta cry”. 

“Do you need me to take care of your bruise?”

“Ren… I’m okay, he didn’t hit me that hard. Think about yourself for a minute, yeah?”.

“N-no, this isn’t fair. I can never forgive him for that”. 

“Sure, he acted like a piece of shit, but I was the one who led him on. I wanted to provoke him. I wanted to get a reaction out of him, and I got what I wanted”. 

“That doesn’t mean it’s ok”, Ren said, a worried look in his eyes.

“I said what I wanted to say”, Yuuto sighed, “You need to go talk to him now”.

Ren’s eyes widened “Are you not worried he’ll hit me too?”

“Ren”. Yuuto put his hand on the other’s shoulder, “Nayuta loves you more than he’s ever loved anything in his stupid life. And I fucking hate that I have to be the one telling you this because he’s a piece of shit who can’t voice his feelings”. He paused.

“Do you wanna know what he said when he started crying?”

“I… I do”.

“He said: ‘Please don’t take my Ren away’”

Ren almost jumped in his chair, “He really said that?”

“Yes. I’m not worried he’ll hurt you, because the only reason he hurt me is ‘cause I hurt him first”. 

“I need to go see him”, Ren said, already running up the stairs to go get ready.

“Yeah, make sure you tell him to go fuck himself as well”, Yuuto muttered while stroking his reddened cheek, probably not loud enough for Ren to hear him.

\--

Ren ran to Nayuta’s house faster than he ever had before. He was angry, upset, livid at Nayuta, and yet he wanted to see him so badly. 

He rang the doorbell and Kenta, Nayuta’s band mate, opened the door for him. 

“Oh, Nanahoshi. Everything alright?”

Ren did not listen to him. “Is Nayuta here?”

“Yeah, he’s in his room, he doesn’t look too goo…”

Ren ignored Kenta once again, and rushed past him to reach Nayuta’s room, where he burst through the door unannounced, finding the other boy still laying in bed in his pajamas. 

Nayuta hid himself under the bedsheets, as if that would have been enough to hide him from Ren. But the other boy wasn’t having any of it, and ripped the covers off Nayuta’s body. 

Ren looked at him dead in the eyes, with the angriest look anyone had ever seen on his face and his fists balled up,

“Fuck you, Nayuta.”

Nothing moved. 

Nayuta had never heard such words coming from Ren’s mouth, it was scary and it was cold, but he knew he deserved it. 

“You hurt me. Every single day that you don’t look at me, you hurt me. Every time you move away when I try to touch you, you hurt me, Nayuta,

I can stay silent and take every blow. But if you hurt my friends, I’m not gonna take it anymore”.

Ren’s fists were so tight, fingernails digging into his skin. His stare never left Nayuta’s face, and determination never left his voice.

“You have a choice, Nayuta. You can apologize to Yuuto, apologize to _me_ , and become a better person, or you can forget I ever came into your life”.

When Nayuta started crying, Ren felt his resolve start to weaken and he sat down next to the other boy in bed, reaching for his hand. 

“You know I love you. And you never say it, but I know you love me too. And I want to be happy with you, I really do. So please, let’s take this step together. I want you to be better, not for me, but for yourself. 

There is no weakness in showing your emotions from time to time”.

Ren brought his hand up to Nayuta’s cheek and wiped away his tears, feeling the other boy leaning into his touch. 

They stayed like that for some time, only Nayuta’s quiet sobs breaking the silence. When his crying slowed down, Nayuta reached his hands behind the other boy’s neck and hugged him tighter than he ever had. 

Ren almost couldn’t sit still with how happy he was, he hugged Nayuta back, leaving a kiss on his cheek before placing his chin on the other’s shoulder. 

“I love you, Nayuta”.

Nayuta didn’t respond, instead he held the other boy tighter and buried his face against his shoulder, like he never wanted to let go.

Maybe declaring his love out loud was still too much for him, but Ren was hopeful that, eventually, they would get there. 

One baby step at a time.

**Author's Note:**

> This doesn't really feel finished, so if anyone likes it I might end up writing an extra chapter for it or something.  
> If you wanna come talk to me about NayuRen, you can find me on twt @ fran2art


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